Bedeviling email is the great paradox of our times.  Formidably convenient as it is inconvenient, electronic mail over the internet showcases the best and worst in our society.

Were I to respond to the dozens of such messages I receive in a single day, I would be medicated beyond consciousness, my penis would have become enlarged to unwieldy proportion, my work from home would be cluttering my house with currency, I would be astutely advised of all matters religious and political, my home would be refinanced at 0.0% interest for two lifetimes, I would possess a myriad of blowout bargains, and the few minutes left of my remaining time would be spent viewing naked models, mature moms fucking teenaged boys, and a young girl in Denmark going down on her dog.

Given the limited time available for flossing, getting dressed, and other simple pleasures, I have reevaluated my need to read every frigging piece of email directed to my cyberdoorstep.

Once my 80GB hard drive fills up, it's all over for me. 

But, wait!  An automatic disk purge a 3:00am on Sunday morning has cleaned up my drive, divested all spam and virus-infested messages, compacting and archiving the ignored contents of my mailbox!

The cycle begins anew.